Insomnia has hit

Well for the past three nights I haven't gotten any sleep, and when I fall asleep, I feel even more tired when I wake up. I don't know what's wrong with me. People say I'm out of it, but I don't know what they truly mean by that. Ugh...life. Harrison didn't get in to UNC. I know he must be crushed but it has me wondering about my chances of getting in...What if I don't? I know I'll feel like a failure. My grandma said today, "You know Anderson, you're usually 2 steps ahead of everyone else." Which I find completely ironic considering I feel as if I'm ten spaces behind where I'm suppose to be. All of the colleges I want to go to are a long shot, even with everything I do.  I'm trying not to freak out, but it's really all I can do. Then people get mad because that's all I talk about anymore. They say to never "wish your life away". I wouldn't have to wish it away if I knew where I was going in life! Things would be easier. I would know what it take to get into a good school. I would know what I want to do with my life. I wouldn't question everything and everyone because it's making me go insane. I'm always thinking about everything I need to do, and everything I haven't done that needs to be done. I don't know when it's going to end. This incessant need to strive in everything I do is not only becoming a problem, but a major one at that. I can't sleep, and a lot of nights I go to bed without eating dinner because I know how much homework I have to do. People come to school saying, "I just said forget homework last night." I'm just like, whoa, wait. How on earth do people do that?? Forget about homework because 'they didn't feel like it'??? If I know I have homework, it gets done. I don't care how late I'm up or if I understand it or not. That's usually how math homework is. I take one look at it, cry for 30 minutes while doing other homework, and then go back to math and try doing it again. Most of the time, my answers are wrong, but I never get an incomplete for an assignment, and if I do, it stays with me for the rest of the day. Like my last biology test, I made a C. Do you think I've been able to let that one go yet? NO. Because I can't. I don't like C's, heck I can't even look at a B without shuddering. I don't understand what more I can do, and I'm afraid there is nothing to do.